Tonight, at 11:59 PM EDT, we will officially close the Craft Whores contest.
“Contest? What contest?” you say?
OMG. Seriously? Don’t make me kick you in the baby maker, bitch.
This is only the single most incredible contest, like, EVER.
Fine. Here’s the CliffsNotes version for you Johnny-Come-Latelies or people with really poor reading comprehension:
We wanted to find a way to share our mutual love of naughty crafts with our equally
twistedgood-humored readers, and thus, Craft Whores was born! You create a craft that is inappropriate, then you write a blog post about it and link it up for a chance to win our undying love and fabulous prizes!
I mean really. Cue the Louis Armstrong because is this a Wonderful World, or what?!
We now interrupt this broadcast with an urgent tomato boner:
Hello, gorgeous! I just needed a photo to break up all this boring text. Found that tomato in my CSA last summer and it was too fabulous to not share. As you were.
Where was I? Oh yes, prizes! So good, they’re worth repeating:
- A $100 Gift Certificate to We Shop at In The Powder Room
- A $50 gift basket of craft supplies from Funny not Slutty
- A $50 Gift Card from EdenFantasys to use on their site
- A Viva La Deez Nutz painting and 3 Breathe Motherfucker magnets by Robin Plemmons
- NEW!!! A $25 gift certificate from Subversive Cross Stitch
- A sculpted vulva candleholder or nut bowl from Lady Estrogen
- A vulva tissue box cover from Carrie at Uknit2
- A “Hillblingy” Goblet from moi!
- Our original Craft Whores cross stitch by my Internet wife, The Suniverse.
You can see photos of the prizes here.
Did you know we have celebrity judges? We do. They rock. Read about them here.
But most importantly, it’s not too late to get in on the fun! And based on the wide array on entries we have so far, the terms “craft” and “inappropriate” are clearly open for creative interpretation. Basically, you can’t go wrong, but if you could, the more wrong the better.
The criteria on which your craft will be judged are as follows:
- Best in Ho (overall best)
- Most Anatomically Correct
- Most Original
- Best Effort by an Apparently Non-Crafty Person
- Honorable Mentions
So quit yer lollygagging and link-up! Or at least go and snicker about all the other twisted crafts that 22 other brave souls have already posted.
Here’s where you go to link-up your inappropriate craft blog post and see the entries.
Special thanks once again to our wonderful corporate sponsors whose support, validation, and generous donations have made this venture even more fun for us all!
Craft Whores is proudly sponsored by:
PS – Several of you have asked us for a fun Craft Whores badge you can put on your own blog. Great idea! We will have one badge for participants and another for winners. Coming soon!
Winners will be announced next Thursday, September 27th.
With peace, love, and porcelain poonannies,